Wednesday, 30 May 2012

Wednesday Wardrobe: Yoga Pants

I was surrounded by a sea of lycra stretched taut over chubby asses.  Hoodies of every colour - pink, black, grey, yellow - pulled down over grotesque muffin tops. Flips flops or crocs or discount running shoes shoved hastily onto calloused feet.  Hair pulled back into sloppy ponytails - blonde hair, brown hair, red hair all in various states of dye jobs falling out of the flimsy elastic and being blown out of faces.

I was dropping Logan off at school this morning.

And I was a first hand witness to the "Mommy Uniform."

Did that send a shiver down your spine?  Cuz it did mine!  Especially because I was wearing the exact same uniform!


It's not really our fault.  Yoga pants are stretchy.  You can bend and catch all sorts of tiny acts of parental disobedience as they are happening.

Running shoes are comfortable and easy to move in.  Discount ones are the only ones that stay at home mommies can afford. 

The classic ponytail is easy and sometimes even keeps the hair out of our faces so we are free to attack that bathroom that our sons have destroyed by not being able to aim - AT ALL.

The hoodie keeps us warm, but not too warm.  It is light and easy to throw on when your child decides to run outside and straight for the road because the Recycle Truck is coming and he needs to see it right now.

But no more.

I can't take it anymore.

Something needs to be done.

As of this moment my yoga pants are officially retired.

I've had it.  Should I go for a ritual burning of the mommy uniform? 

It was so disheartening today to see this spectacle at the school.  When did I get so "mommy?" Yech...

I resolve to try harder with regards to my wardrobe. 

Maybe I oughta reinstate the summer of no pants again this summer?  That seemed to work last year to get me out of a fashion rut.


Anyway... I also lost the 4 lbs that I gained during my bad week last week.  :D

1 comment:

Kathryn said...

I love wearing long full maxi skirts with elastic or drawstring waists in the summer (can usually pick up for cheap a Goodwill or Salvation Army).

They are a bit dressier and hide a multitude of sins while looking a bit dressy and as comfortable as sweat pants. If you lose (and hopefully not gain) a little weight they still fit.

You could pair them with a t-shirt and a comfortable pair or shoes, sandals or even a pair of flip flops.

Instead of pony tail you could try a colorful head wrap or band, clasps, braiding or even a bun.